ChrisDK: Flirt4Free Gazette - New issue! - 3/12/16

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Games: Flirt4Free Gazette - New issue!

Created by: chrisdk

3/12/16 @ 4:28am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: Spain, longing for Denmark
Posts: 2,447

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Ladies (?) and Gentlemen,
it is my pleasure to announce the first issue of the F4F online Gazette.
Unfortunately, we are understaffed and need YOUR help to keep fresh articles coming.
Investigative journalism and truthful facts are ... not so important, let's come up with some outrageous rumors

and impossible news to maintain a solid readership.

Labor Unions forming on Flirt
-------------------------------------------------
More and more members of similar profession are coming together to form unions and dispute with F4F for union forums and events.
Thus, the Teacher's and Coach's Union claims exclusive, all inclusive access to all college guys'n'girls cam shows, the Cowboy Union is looking for nurses, the Pilot Union for secretaries and pirate babes, Housewifes are desperate for Guys next door and the Union of CEOs claims all slaves, in particular cash slaves, to be theirs.
Please all remember to give your vote on this. Completely free shows within your union, but horrendous prices if you look for something ... forbidden

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Created by: chrisdk

3/14/16 @ 1:36am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: Spain, longing for Denmark
Posts: 2,447

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Unbelievably large dicks roaming F4F
------------------------------------------------------
According to statistics (never) raised amongst members, the average cock size of our busy visitors is 10in! Up to 15in have been reported in that survey, so be aware that our always honest visitors are not bragging about size, this seems rather a common factor among the lonely.
Look how much good this site does for the industry of lubricants and paper towels ...

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Created by: chrisdk

3/15/16 @ 4:36pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: Spain, longing for Denmark
Posts: 2,447

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Kinky Poetry Slam
-----------------------
Dear readers, this is a first call to send in your lustful lyrics and erotic rhymes for our annual Kinky Poetry Slam.

To all you copycats out there, we ARE checking the originality of your entry AND we know "Physical" by Olivia Newton John, we received that ten times last year ...

Please abide from rhyming recipes. This is not the Food4Free Magazine ... Here, we accept "delicious" only in context with body parts.

Let's get down to it.

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Created by: chrisdk

3/18/16 @ 4:14am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: Spain, longing for Denmark
Posts: 2,447

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Librarian soon to be promoted?
------------------------------------------------
ronnie-uk has tended to the sacred scrolls of Flirt history for over 4 years now.
As a gofer for F4F he has been Daily VOD Inspector and Jerkoff Training Instructor before that.
Rumor has it that he will soon be promoted to the most sacred job on Flirt, the Official Measurer of Cocks.
The waiting is over ronnie, you deserve it, congratulations from our side!

The Golden Ruler will thus be passed on
and everybody be discouraged to brag about size (see our earlier issue #2).
The succession for his post as Librarian is not yet settled and some say there is no one available with his expertise.

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Created by: chrisdk

3/19/16 @ 9:47am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: Spain, longing for Denmark
Posts: 2,447

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F4F band on world tour
---------------------------------
Remember how in September 2015 we created our first ever Boy Band on Flirt? Those guys are hitting it off and will start a world tour in summer this year. They will even play in LiveCamMansion and please those beauties with their salacious songs.
We expect such great classics as "The Wanker's Waltz" and "Why is Mommy Moaning?", upbeat dance numbers "Do me disco" and "Toss my Salad", but also reflective songs such as the "Erectile Dysfunction Blues". A big thank you to songwriter SamDavidisSexy for all those great song lyrics.
Tickets will soon go on sale and we expect them to be sold out within a few hours.

Please be aware, that our guys cannot, as they usually do, be all naked on stage. However, it will be a hot and steamy show, aka fireworks and fog machine are in place.

It is about time to create a girl band, too, no?

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Created by: chrisdk

3/20/16 @ 3:22am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: Spain, longing for Denmark
Posts: 2,447

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The mystery about female members
-------------------------------------------------------
Anonymity on a site with services such as Flirt is written in capital golden letters (please use your fantasy dear readers, our graphics department has no budget).
Thus we have no statistics about users, how many are there, how are they distributed on the globe?

One of the biggest myths remain female members.
Do they exist? If so, are they mostly Lesbians? Old vultures? Business women with no time for real life relationships?
Do they feel a special need to hide?

Some male performers reported on private and cam to cam shows with females.
What is their story? What their motivation?

Will we ever know? Will we ever make contact?

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Created by: chrisdk

3/21/16 @ 2:17pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: Spain, longing for Denmark
Posts: 2,447

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Mister and Miss Flirtyverse 2015
------------------------------------------
Our annual election of Mister and Miss Flirtyverse is soon, so please send in your nominations.
Who is the absolute most fabulous (fe)male performer you ever met and why? What makes him/her so special and how does (s)he make YOU feel special?
Let's unveil the secrets to successfull cam modelling and reward the experts in virtual interpersonal relationships.

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Created by: chrisdk

3/22/16 @ 1:52am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: Spain, longing for Denmark
Posts: 2,447

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Happy Easter!
-------------
Your always informative Gazette takes a holiday break and wishes you all happy Easter.
Whether you like boobs or balls, be sure that with Flirt models there is always something special hidden... It is Easter all around the year!

Please don't break into our premises while we are away, you would be utterly disappointed by our old equipment only our minds are fresh.
If you do and get very angry despite the heads-up, please don't burn or break anything inside, we need it.

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Created by: blue-eyed.blonde

3/28/16 @ 5:16am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: Spain, Memories of Denmark

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Letter to the editor: On your article "The mystery about female members"
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I am reading with interest your gazette, I feel so well informed :winkwink

, thanks for that.
Mmh, I thought I should come out (LOL) and say a few words about, well, the experience of ONE female member on Flirt.

You wouldn't believe how nasty a male performer can be(come) when you try to tell him you're a woman.
So far, honestly, straight men modelling here have been the worst.
> On the one hand, the distrust is huge, it is probably the fear to be fooled by a member.
> On the other hand, some turn out to be jerks just as in real life. I have heard "Why don't you go into the next bar, if you're looking for sex?" so often by now, it sucks.

Gay performers tend to deny privates or get all weird about it.
I have never been banned for that, but I get ignored a lot, though trying to strike a conversation.

Personally, I made my best experiences on here with bi-sexual men, they seem the most laid-back and open-minded.
With a few performers, shows became better after telling them the truth about me, but with most, it was a desaster, so I do indeed hide.

Always wanted to start a discussion on the male performer forum about that, but let's face it, they would ignore it

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Created by: chrisdk

3/31/16 @ 3:10am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: Spain, longing for Denmark
Posts: 2,447

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Erotic Short Fiction Contest Winner
----------------------------------------
While we are still evaluating the submissions for our Kinky Poetry Slam (see issue #3), we have selected the winner of our contest for the best Erotic Short Fiction written by a model or member. Here it is in prickling prose. Enjoy!

"""
Photo session
-------------
I had a professional photo shoot once where for several hours I was asked to wear varying pieces of underwear and pose in front of different backgrounds. It was nerve racking, but it was also fun, because I had instantly a crush on the photographer. He was much older than me and the way he took control by telling me how to stand, what to do with my hands or how to look into the camera made my bl00d rush. The fact that I was almost naked all the time did not seem to distract him, but I was very aware of that.

He was satisfied with my work and we had a look at the photos on the computer right away. What I saw made my face go red like a tomato. I had been flirting heavily with "the camera" as the photographer put it, just like a pro, but I know the truth. I tried to seduce him through the only object he cared about. The lens of his camera.
"""

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Created by: chrisdk

4/5/16 @ 8:31am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: Spain, longing for Denmark
Posts: 2,447

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Kinky Poetry Slam Winner
----------------------------------------
Again, we received a number of great recipes in verses, but the winner of our Kinky Poetry Slam is of course all about the human body

. Enjoy!

"""
I want you
-----------
I want to kiss your body with my eyes,
I want to smell your excitement with my lips,
I want to hear your breathing with my mouth,
I want to see your anxiety with my ears,
I want to taste your courage with my fingers,
I want to caress your beauty with my heartbeat.
I. Want. You.
"""

A notable second place was given to this Naughy Limerick:
"""
There was a young lady of Glasgow,
And fondly her lover did ask, 'Oh,
Pray allow me a fuck,
But she said,'No, my duck,
But you may, if you please, up my arse go."
"""

The selected winners are rewarded the recognition of our devoted readers.

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Created by: lickau

4/9/16 @ 2:18pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: Moving slowly but surely somewhere sometime
Posts: 29,285

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Game Forum became the most replied forum on 8 April 2016

---------------------------------------------------------

ChrisDK has revigerated the game forum with NEW games and re-tooling of some old games .
The race to 100,000 replies is on now !
Closest forum is Female Performers .
Which forum will win ?

---------------------------------------------------------

Mind Games - John Lennon

We're playing those mind games together
Pushing the barriers planting seeds
Playing the mind guerrilla
Chanting the Mantra peace on earth
We all been playing those mind games forever
Some kinda druid dudes lifting the veil
Doing the mind guerrilla
Some call it magic the search for the grail

Love is the answer and you know that for sure
Love is a flower
You got to let it, you gotta let it grow

So keep on playing those mind games together
Faith in the future out of the now
You just can't beat on those mind guerrillas
Absolute elsewhere in the stones of your mind
Yeah we're playing those mind games forever
Projecting our images in space and in time

Yes is the answer and you know that for sure
Yes is surrender
You got to let it, you gotta let it go

So keep on playing those mind games together
Doing the ritual dance in the sun
Millions of mind guerrillas
Putting their soul power to the karmic wheel
Keep on playing those mind games forever
Raising the spirit of peace and love

Songwriters: JOHN LENNON
© Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Universal Music Publishing Group
For non-commercial use only.

---------------------------------------------------------

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Created by: chrisdk

4/12/16 @ 7:02am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: Spain, longing for Denmark
Posts: 2,447

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Wanted: ourjeffie, Brisbane, Australia
----------------------------------------------------
Have you seen an Australian without direction roaming this site? Has he been in your room?
If so, PLEASE show him the way back to the games forum. Lure him with the fact, that there is a new game available:
The Celebrity Chain Game.
This is a simple game that allows a fast answer, the type of game ourjeffie loves the most!

You will recognize his strange accent and humor and the greeting he usually receives from others: Ozzy ozzy ozzy, oi oi oi.
He might be in company of a shepard dog, a flock of sheep, a koala bear, a kangaroo AND a wallaby. You can hardly overlook them.
He might be drunk on cask wine (it's box wine, but HE cares!).
He might be bullied by New Zealanders!

The Games Forum wants ourjeffie back! :offtopic

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Created by: chrisdk

4/17/16 @ 1:43am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: Spain, longing for Denmark
Posts: 2,447

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Girls are taking over the games forum!
----------------------------------------------

With ourjeffie gone missing and Derek watching playoffs there are currently more women on the Games Forum than men (although some say, LickaU counts for up to 5 and still being of legal age). We will keep observing if they will find other games then the Song-Artist Game of interest.
Will this shift the humor used in the Games Forum? Are we reaching 100k replies in no time now?

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Created by: chrisdk

4/18/16 @ 12:07pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: Spain, longing for Denmark
Posts: 2,447

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100 000 replies in Game Forum reached - Celebrated with a new game!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------
Finally, the Games forum reached 100 000 replies with only some 25 threads used regularly. While the Female Performer Forum is still in the run to be the second forum to reach this impressive number of replies, the Male Perfomer Forum is far off with only half of the needed number of replies (though they made a good start on the comparative Fetish Forums).

To celebrate our joy, we started yet a new game. The aim is to have only active games on the first page of this forum!
There are rumors that Derek might be brooding over the next generation of a forum game. Also our editorial office has still one or two up the sleeve. Great times await us!

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Created by: chrisdk

4/24/16 @ 3:54am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: Spain, longing for Denmark
Posts: 2,447

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Games Forum sprinting through the Spring season!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
It seems only yesterday that we surpassed the 100k reply in the Games Forum. Now Spring Fever is invigorating members and with 9 active players in the past week, we made a huge jump already, while the Female performer forum is still in hybernation. Is Derek thinking about new games, too? Get all the latest (aka late) news in your Gazette!

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Created by: chrisdk

5/2/16 @ 8:56am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: Spain, longing for Denmark
Posts: 2,447

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Chubby? CHUBBY ?!?!?!
----------------------------------------
What is it that makes a performer think (s)he belongs into the chubby category the moment (s)he confesses not to go to the gym or exercise in any other way? This does NOT make you a chubby person. Okay, not particularly muscular, but still slim and slender like a gazelle ...
What is it that takes away your self-esteem? Rude members?? You are actually listening to THOSE? Stop it right now.
Guys'n'girls you are perfect the way you are and a little meat, a bit of a buffer zone is no reason to think you're not slim.
In the end, listen to those friendly souls who return to your room and not to the trouble makers.

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Created by: chrisdk

5/9/16 @ 1:15am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: Spain, longing for Denmark
Posts: 2,447

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Opening Week of Flirt's new ChitChat Café was a blast!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dear Readers,

do you already know the ChitChat Café? A place to meet and greet and relax between games with a (root)beer, coffee and cOOkies, chocolate cakes and whatever you would like. Prices are a little elevated (because we get our share ...), but so far the response has been marvellous!
Make sure to step in and say hi, because it is the best place to be, discuss about rules and rumours, and giggle about gossip.

Everyone: Welcome!

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Created by: chrisdk

5/20/16 @ 5:19am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: Spain, longing for Denmark
Posts: 2,447

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Game Forum Players take a Stand!
----------------------------------------
It is a shame, that the Game Forum contains so many games that were created and played by male and female performers who do not even have access anymore to this section of the forum. How did it even come to that?

In the ancient times on Flirt with only a few forum sections, games were played in the performer forums and both members and models got annoyed by these busy threads that were always on top and seemed to obscure the more interesting topics. Given that today, almost the entire first page of the Game Forum consists of actively played games, this is understandable.
Thus the Games Forum was created, but why did it seem necessary to additionally hide the new forum from the performers?

Active players today agree, the F..um was taken out of it and the lively interaction with performers is dearly missed. A game is a place where performers can show their personalities and members can meet and greet them in a more relaxed environment. The only more relaxed place is the ChitChat Café.

No matter your religion, gender or ... side of the screen.
Players and hustlers, gamblers and gamesters, unite and let's make this forum great again!

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Created by: lickau

6/8/16 @ 10:19pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: Moving slowly but surely somewhere sometime
Posts: 29,285

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Game Forum with Projected Win with Models having Future Access !
----------------------------------------------------------------

Models will have access after Tech Department links Game Forum for the Models to see and participate .
http://www.flirt4free.com/forums/threads.php?forum_id=9&thread_id=2793&num_posts=10
OutbackPrinc e started the topic in Tech Forum :bowdown

43 ACTIVE games in last 24 hours PLUS Gazette and Chit Chat Café ! :bowdown

I hope Admin will allow an Announcement of Revamped Games in the News & Announcements forum .
I nominate Chris to draft a future announcement so all members will have more chance to see about the improvement to THIS forum .

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